Sadness
Deep sadness
It is as though you are standing on the shore watching a wall of water come in
No matter what direction you look or how far you tilt your head back
Just a wall of powerful water, a Tsunami
You feel small
You are small
You wonder will it knock you over or leave you unconscious
Where it will take you, will you know your way?
Will you even survive? Do you even want to?
Will anyone notice you were swallowed up by the ocean?
Grief
Spirit sucking grief
It as though in a moment of sunshine someone dives in to your chest violently grabbing your heart
You don’t expect it, you never do
It comes at 3 am and shakes you awake, running away with your breath
You try to catch it, gasping, choking
You can’t
The lights are turned on
Except your light
Your light is out
Total darkness
You wonder if anyone can see you if you can’t see yourself?
Walking around with your weighted vest, heavy
Nothing else
Just useless weight
Tears become quiet, unpredictable, constant
You hope maybe they wash it away, even a little
You just want some relief, less pain
The grief hurts
The sadness hurts
It all hurts in ways that words cannot express
Does anyone out there know
Can anyone tell me
How to not love?
~Alisa Hutton
Alisa, such poignant sorrow in this poem. Very powerful. Thank you for sharing. S
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Thank you and you are always welcome xo.
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🤓
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I look forward to exploring your back catalog of posts Alisa!
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Thanks:)
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My pleasure!
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If we knew how not to love, I’m quite sure we’d die right where we’re standing.
Alisa, this is a very moving poem. Peace to you for writing it. Hard to read, but truly worth it.
“You don’t expect it, you never do
It comes at 3 am and shakes you awake, running away with your breath
You try to catch it, gasping, choking
You can’t
The lights are turned on
Except your light
Your light is out
Total darkness
You wonder if anyone can see you if you can’t see yourself?
Walking around with your weighted vest, heavy
Nothing else
Just useless weight”
Take care. Be well.
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Thanks, Tre. I think you are right. It was a rather blunt feeling piece for me but I feel like sadness and grieving come in this nature, blunt. Honestly not my favorite to write but every so often feel it necessary.
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Understood. You are welcome.
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❤🙏🏼
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I can only say that those who love deeply feel everything in this way. From my own experience love is the greatest feeling there is but it will always come with strings attached. I have to say I could not live life any other way. Beautiful write.
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So very true. Thank you, Renee.
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What is it about 3 am? This is wonderful writing, Alisa. I think we’ve been moving in the same circles for a while, I’m happy to connect!
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There is something about that 3am. Thank you, Meg. I think so and I am happy to have connected:)
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🌺 have a great weekend 🌺
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Terrific analogy Alisa.
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